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The Thaddeus Gazette

Odometer

8/14/19
A very great man (okay, Henry Ford Jr.) once said, "Never complain. Never explain." Words to live by...(read on)


Grouchland Über Alles

6/10/19
These days I'm so busy, I go to scratch my ass and I've already moved it...(read on)


Hanging Up The Eyepatch

5/12/19
Howdy ho neighbor, I'm a retired pirate. YARRRRR!...(read on)


Boom

4/28/19
There's an old joke in the best of tonedeaf families: Q: What instrument do you play? A: I play the heck out of the radio...(read on)


Sketch

4/14/19
My heart has joined the Thousand, for my friend stopped running today...(read on)


Be Kind To Drummers Week

3/31/19
Performing musicians have a dual terror connected with aging. One is of nursing homes. The other is of playing nursing homes....(read on)


Backstage Past

3/19/19

Every man and every woman is a star.
Aleister Crowley, The Book Of The Law
...(read on)

Apocalypse Wha?

3/10/19
Consider the red lobster. Consider the red herring. Consider the red heifer...(read on)


Fast Froward

3/4/19
The proclivity for anthropomorphizing, the attribution of human-like traits and motivations to nonhuman creatures, inanimate objects and even abstract processes, is shared by humans of every rank and file from precious tiny children to grown-ass adult scientists....(read on)


Monster, Delayed

2/24/19
Sometimes it takes a long time to get what you want...(read on)


Gresham Is Coming

2/18/19
There's nothing like a Grateful Dead show. Or an Internet discussion...(read on)


68

2/10/19
I've said it before and I'll shamelessly plagiarize myself: Facebook's killer app is birthday greetings...(read on)


Rerun

2/2/19
One of the perks of a long running journal is the ability to do reprints...(read on)


Is Dis A System?

1/27/19
Tuesday bright and early. Early, anyways. Punch up some kind of breakfast, pack Little Girl off to preschool (wha? bless remedial education) and head out to the Y. Yes, we're jocking it out.

Okay, we're wheezing it out, at least I am. A is a Certified Water Instructor and does the senior class on Mondays (not to be confused with the Senior Class in the 12th grade). I settle for stretching out my battered shoulders and riding the exercycle. So in to the gym, flash my Y card, grab a towel, hit the locker room and start digging out my sweats and — no lock...(read on)


What Happened

1/20/19

One of the problems of being lost and found is all the explainations you have to make. So having recently bobbed back to the surface like some bloated corpse in a cheap thriller, a bad penny back in circulation, I have to guess many of my faithful readers (maybe both of em) are wondering Whatever Became Of Baby Thaddeus? I mean, two years? You never write? You never call? Nu?

Fair question, and I'm sure the answer won't be satisfying, but here's trying....(read on)


The Calendar (The Long Way Around)

1/12/19

Well, here we are. It's me again...(read on)


Wheel

1/19/17

We stand on the brink of a momentous era in American history, a time of revival, of renewal, of regeneration, a time fated to be remembered as one that made America great again.

But not just yet—first we have to get through the Fumptruck administration...(read on)


Happy Holidays!

12/29/16

From the latke-stuffed depths of the season ...(read on)


Perfect Timing

11/17/16

Ah, my liberal cobelligerants, I greet you. You share the great dream, justice and equity for all. You dare to ask "What if?" and "Why not?" For you, the fruits of industry and innovation are to be shared, not sequestered and squandered in primitive pageantry of ownership.

And for you, the Trump Supremacy is THE EXISTENTIAL THREAT OF THE MILLENIUM, THE KNIFE IN THE HEART OF SOCIETY, THE HOWLING BEAST OF BLOOD AND FIRE BREACHING THE WALLS OF CIVILITY TO RAVAGE AN INNOCENT POPULATION AND PLUNGE THE WORLD INTO A NEW AGE OF DARKNESS!!!

Not for me, so sorry. I've had a broken timing belt to deal with ...(read on)


Blast From The Past

10/31/16

Away back in the dim dark ages of the first of the first of the Thaddeus Gazette, current events prompted me to pen this pathetic little essay bemoaning the incivility of the civil discourse then in vogue. Hindsight is a bitch ...(read on)


Cranky And Johnny

5/15/16

Cats, Garfield once pontificated, are the world's best treeclimbers and the world's worst treeclimber-downers. That he made this pronouncement whilst dangling from a lofty bough by his toesies only serves to increase his authority ...(read on)


And So It Begins—Again

1/17/16

Okay, I quit. I admit it. I give up. HAPPY FREAKIN NEW YEAR DAMMIT ...(read on)


Hospital

10/15/15
Well.

Unwell, actually...(read on)


Mileage And Maintenance

7/09/15

Long about half-past November last, I started feeling pain in my right shoulder. At first it was just a twinge while completing a mouse-intensive computer task. Fairly rapidly it grew into a constant, nagging stab, accompanied by a grinding of tendons reminiscent of a cranky transmission in a VW bug ...(read on)


A Likely Story

5/17/15

The literature of the paranormal is rife with anecdotes. Naturally, the legitimacy of such stories is primally impacted by the verifiable veracity of their sources. Credible professionals such as doctors, lawyers, police officers and public officials are frequently cited as eyewitnesses to various supernatural events such as ghosts, flying saucers and alien abduction. Their accounts frequently take the form, "I couldn't believe my eyes but there it was."

Should we then take these testimonies as convincing evidence that there is a hard case for ghosts, flying saucers and alien abduction? Not really. ...(read on)


Sporty And Shorty

4/26/15

Ah, youth, fleeting and feckless. When I was young, footloose and slightly insane, I married me a wild and crazy blues mama and we set out to see the world...(read on)


Hot Off The Press

4/11/15

All too often, songwriters are like those malificent individuals classically described by Somerset Maugham:

"Do you like card tricks?"
"No, I hate card tricks," I answered.
"Well I'll just show you this one."
...(read on)

Π In Your Face

3/14/15
Huzzah huzzah, ring the bells and shred the documents, it's Pi Day! ...(read on)


When I'm 64

3/5/15
I always contend that I'll live to be a hundred, fully cognizant of the unlikelihood of that event...(read on)


Slack And Blue

2/25/15
Okay, I'll admit it. I'm a slacker...(read on)


No Matter How Thin You Slice It

3/27/14
Great little town, Seattle. Culture out the wazoo. Hammering Man! Grunge! The Space Needle! Rain! Macklemore! The Seahawks! Mountains! Oceans! Rain! No matter what your taste slurps, there's a flavor in your flavor here.

But if you're a none-of-the-above kinda kid, have we got a flavor for you: Moisture Festival!....(read on)


The Kalendar Kid Writhes Again!

12/30/13
Right about this time each year, down here where the dark rolls over and exposes its pale, faintly luminescent underbelly, I tend towards a creative habit, a spasm, if you will, of what shreds of creativity remain in the burnt-out bulb of my sensorium: I put out a calendar....(read on)

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