Gresham Is Coming
Is Dis A System?
Okay, we're wheezing it out, at least I am. A is a Certified Water Instructor and does the senior class on Mondays (not to be confused with the Senior Class in the 12th grade). I settle for stretching out my battered shoulders and riding the exercycle. So in to the gym, flash my Y card, grab a towel, hit the locker room and start digging out my sweats and — no lock...(read on)
One of the problems of being lost and found is all the explainations you have to make. So having recently bobbed back to the surface like some bloated corpse in a cheap thriller, a bad penny back in circulation, I have to guess many of my faithful readers (maybe both of em) are wondering Whatever Became Of Baby Thaddeus? I mean, two years? You never write? You never call? Nu?
Fair question, and I'm sure the answer won't be satisfying, but here's trying....(read on)
The Calendar (The Long Way Around)
Well, here we are. It's me again...(read on)
We stand on the brink of a momentous era in American history, a time of revival, of renewal, of regeneration, a time fated to be remembered as one that made America great again.
But not just yet—first we have to get through the Fumptruck administration...(read on)
From the latke-stuffed depths of the season ...(read on)
Ah, my liberal cobelligerants, I greet you. You share the great dream, justice and equity for all. You dare to ask "What if?" and "Why not?" For you, the fruits of industry and innovation are to be shared, not sequestered and squandered in primitive pageantry of ownership.
And for you, the Trump Supremacy is THE EXISTENTIAL THREAT OF THE MILLENIUM, THE KNIFE IN THE HEART OF SOCIETY, THE HOWLING BEAST OF BLOOD AND FIRE BREACHING THE WALLS OF CIVILITY TO RAVAGE AN INNOCENT POPULATION AND PLUNGE THE WORLD INTO A NEW AGE OF DARKNESS!!!
Not for me, so sorry. I've had a broken timing belt to deal with ...(read on)
Blast From The Past
Away back in the dim dark ages of the first of the first of the Thaddeus Gazette, current events prompted me to pen this pathetic little essay bemoaning the incivility of the civil discourse then in vogue. Hindsight is a bitch ...(read on)
Cranky And Johnny
Cats, Garfield once pontificated, are the world's best treeclimbers and the world's worst treeclimber-downers. That he made this pronouncement whilst dangling from a lofty bough by his toesies only serves to increase his authority ...(read on)
And So It Begins—Again
Okay, I quit. I admit it. I give up. HAPPY FREAKIN NEW YEAR DAMMIT ...(read on)
Unwell, actually...(read on)
Mileage And Maintenance
Long about half-past November last, I started feeling pain in my right shoulder. At first it was just a twinge while completing a mouse-intensive computer task. Fairly rapidly it grew into a constant, nagging stab, accompanied by a grinding of tendons reminiscent of a cranky transmission in a VW bug ...(read on)
A Likely Story
The literature of the paranormal is rife with anecdotes. Naturally, the legitimacy of such stories is primally impacted by the verifiable veracity of their sources. Credible professionals such as doctors, lawyers, police officers and public officials are frequently cited as eyewitnesses to various supernatural events such as ghosts, flying saucers and alien abduction. Their accounts frequently take the form, "I couldn't believe my eyes but there it was."
Should we then take these testimonies as convincing evidence that there is a hard case for ghosts, flying saucers and alien abduction? Not really. ...(read on)
Sporty And Shorty
Ah, youth, fleeting and feckless. When I was young, footloose and slightly insane, I married me a wild and crazy blues mama and we set out to see the world...(read on)
Hot Off The Press
All too often, songwriters are like those malificent individuals classically described by Somerset Maugham:
"Do you like card tricks?"...(read on)
Π In Your Face
When I'm 64
Slack And Blue
No Matter How Thin You Slice It
The Kalendar Kid Writhes Again!